In honor of the spectacular drunken mess scheduled for next week, the Globe has once again rolled out their annual contest for "limericks that sum up Boston." I couldn't resist entering it. Here's mine:
Said the Globe's troubled boss, Marty Baron,
"The news biz is, frankly, despairin'.
Half the folks who find facts
Will be getting the axe.
Now go cover some rich MILFs in Sharon!"
Anybody else? If you enter this contest, please, please post your limerick here as well. (Suldog, that means you!)
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Since you showed me yours...
ReplyDeleteI once took a trip to South Boston,
It was snowing some snow I got lost in,
Instead of 7th and G,
I was at Broadway and E,
It's all good; I read a book about defrostin'
(It helps if you know that there's a library by E and Broadway.)
That was my entry. I was actually prompted to enter that one by "Librarian On The Run", at whose blog I first posted it, in response to her own entry.
(Goodness, that sentence can't possibly be grammatically correct. Oh, well.)
(And this may be a double comment on my part, as something happened to my computer while posting. If so, feel free to delete one.)
That was a great limerick. Very clever.
ReplyDeleteGLOBE TO DIE, warns a dubious article.
ReplyDeleteMaybe so--but would that be so horrible?
For the paper lacks vigor!
It's the Herald, but bigger!
That's the truth, or my name's not Mike Barnicle.
Nice, Anon.
ReplyDeleteBack when we first hired Kevin Cullen,
ReplyDeleteFoul misdeeds he was always anullin'.
Now he drones about wiseguys,
And breathes Irish-eyes sighs,
And kisses the ass of L. Mullen.
Blue lights lit up the night sky.
ReplyDeleteThe columnist swore, burped, and asked why.
In the company car,
He hadn't gone far,
But now, his rap sheet reads "DUI."
The problem with young Johnny Diaz
ReplyDeleteIsn't just the assignments that he has.
It's the limp, listless prose
that makes one hold one's nose,
and ponder the value a tree has.
Bravo, bravo. Gold stars for all of you. These are amazing.
ReplyDeleteHey McMorrow! Challenge accepted.
ReplyDeleteThough his brain is the size of a goby
The Globe just won't dump Jeff Jacoby.
Why hire a Poindex-
Ter when you can scrape dreck
From the bottom of Lake Okeechobee?
A self-employed fellow from Hingham
ReplyDeleteHas a disturbing lump on his lingam
But his lame Mass. health plan
Doesn't cover that, man.
'though the steep monthly payments still sting 'im.
By the way, I would point out that last year's winning entry actually doesn't rhyme, but maybe it does if you come from Worcester.
ReplyDelete